You Don’t Need a Better Vacation. You Need a Different One.

Introduction

Over the years, I’ve noticed something that has nothing to do with macros, workouts, or step counts—but impacts all of them.

People are consistently bad at vacationing.

Not because they don’t take time off.

Not because they don’t spend money.

But because the way they approach time away often creates more stress than it resolves.

I’ve had clients return from a week off feeling:

• more fatigued

• more inflamed

• more anxious

• and further from their routine than when they left

At some point, I started saying:

“You might need a vacation from your vacation.”

It usually gets a laugh. But it’s also usually true.

What “Vacation” Was Meant to Do

The word vacation comes from the Latin vacare—to be empty, free, or unoccupied.

That definition matters.

Because most modern vacations don’t create freedom.

They create compressed intensity.

Instead of removing demands, we replace them with new ones:

• strict itineraries

• early wake times

• constant stimulation

• social expectations

• travel logistics

  
  

We leave our structured lives… and build a more chaotic version somewhere else.

The Cultural Layer: Why Midwestern Vacations Hit Harder

This isn’t just individual behavior—it’s cultural.

In the Midwest, there’s a strong narrative around what a “real vacation” should look like:

• You leave home

• You spend significantly

• You travel far

• You maximize the experience

• 
  

Spring break isn’t framed as rest.

It’s framed as consumption and experience.

Compare that to friends and clients I know in places like Britain or New Zealand, where time off often looks different:

• slower pacing

• less pressure to “see everything”

• more emphasis on being rather than doing

  
  

That doesn’t mean no travel—it means less urgency attached to it. They go off to the mountains or beach and it's like clocks don't exist. And their employers actually respect their time off.

In contrast, many Americans—especially in the Midwest—treat vacation like a performance.

And performance is the other end of the spectrum from recovery.

What the Science Suggests About “Bad Vacations”

From a physiological standpoint, most high-intensity vacations stack multiple stressors at once:

• Sleep disruption (time zones, unfamiliar environments)

• Circadian rhythm shifts (light exposure changes, irregular schedules)

• Digestive stress (new foods, alcohol, irregular eating patterns)

• Increased allostatic load (your body adapting to constant change)

  
  

Research on travel fatigue and circadian misalignment shows that even small disruptions to sleep-wake cycles can impair:

• mood

• cognition

• metabolic regulation

It's a double whammy of 'what the hell is going on' in the Midwest when we get less than three weeks to adjust to daylight savings and then we choose to travel.

Layer on top of that:

• long travel days

• decision fatigue

• social overstimulation

…and you’ve created the opposite of what recovery requires.

Psychologically, there’s also a mismatch.

When expectations are high (“this needs to be amazing”), pressure increases.

And pressure tends to reduce actual enjoyment.

My Own Shift: Listening to Biofeedback

I didn’t land on this perspective philosophically. I landed on it practically.

After enough trips where I came back:

• exhausted

• off-schedule

• struggling to sleep

• needing days to “recover”

…I had to ask a simple question:

“If this is supposed to help me feel better, why don’t I feel better?”

That’s biofeedback.

Not theory. Not trends. Just data from my own body.

So I started experimenting.

Instead of going somewhere new, I stayed put.

Same house. Same environment. Same 1200 square feet I do most of my life in.

But I removed the demands:

• no alarms

• no obligations

• no work

• no pressure to produce or optimize

• 
  

I slept more.

Moved when I felt like it.

Ate normally.

Spent time in the quiet.

And the result?

I came back actually restored.

The Biopsychosocial Model of Recovery

If we zoom out, this all fits neatly into the bio-psycho-social model—the idea that your health is shaped by biological, psychological, and social factors.

Biological:

Your body thrives on rhythm and predictability.Drastic changes in sleep, food, and environment increase stress—even if they’re “fun.”

Psychological:

Constant decision-making, planning, and expectation-setting create cognitive load.Even enjoyable activities can become draining when stacked too densely.

Social:

Cultural expectations (“you should travel,” “make it count,” “live it up”) influence behavior in ways that override internal signals.

When all three are misaligned, you don’t get recovery.

You get depletion in a different location.

What Actually Restores People

The clients I’ve seen come back the most refreshed don’t follow the typical script.

They:

• sleep more than usual

• simplify their days

• reduce decisions

• spend time in familiar or low-demand environments

• move gently instead of intensely

• 
  

Sometimes that’s a quiet trip.

Sometimes it’s a cabin.

And sometimes—it’s a staycation.

The Case for Staying Put

This is where things get countercultural.

Because if the goal is to create space, then travel isn’t always required.

In fact, for a lot of people, it’s counterproductive.

A staycation—done intentionally—removes many of the biological and psychological stressors:

• no travel fatigue

• no time zone disruption

• no environmental adjustment period

• 
  

You keep the stability.

And remove the pressure.

When I tell clients that my best vacations often happen in my own home—sometimes in my basement—I get some looks.

But the results speak for themselves.

I don’t need to recover from my time off.

I return to work already steady.

Actionable Insight

Before your next vacation, ask a different question.

Not:

“Where should I go?”

But:

“What would actually leave me feeling restored?”

For some people, that will still involve travel.

But for many, the answer isn’t more distance.

It’s more space.

Closing Thoughts

If you step back, the goal of a vacation isn’t to impress anyone or accumulate experiences.

It’s to change your internal state.

And that’s where most people get tripped up—they chase external novelty instead of internal restoration.

The irony is that we’ll spend thousands of dollars, cross multiple time zones, and meticulously plan every hour… all in the name of “getting away from stress.”

Meanwhile, the conditions that actually reduce stress—predictability, simplicity, autonomy, and rest—are often available much closer than we think.

Sometimes in a different country.

Sometimes in a quiet cabin.

And sometimes in the same home you’ve been in all along—just experienced differently.

The shift isn’t in the destination.

It’s in understanding what your body and mind are actually asking for—and having the discipline to give it to them.